Kristina Botsu, BA BDiv
Registered Therapeutic Counsellor (RTC) #2702
About Kristina
Toxic shame inhibits us from seeking comfort and support. In a reenactment of the childhood abandonment we are often flashing back to, we often isolate ourselves and hopelessly surrender to an overwhelming feeling of humiliation. This is one of the reasons why we can continuously struggle in our current relationships with co-dependency and conflict/distancing patterns. Trauma always seeks resolution through the current relationship. But we have not been taught how to navigate it in a healthy way to gain resourceful resolution and feel fulfilled when staying in connection.
If you are stuck viewing yourself as worthless or defective, you are probably in an emotional flashback. This is typically also true when you are lost in self-hate and chronic self- criticism.
Therapeutic compassionate experience can help you to enhance self-compassion considerably farther than what is possible to accomplish on your own.
This is true, because the damage that happened in the primary relationship can be repaired in today’s relationship, but not so much in isolation. However, it might be not the relationship with the same people from your past and often should not be, but what counts is the new empathetic and emotionally attuned experience you get when you are disclosing your hurt feelings in the therapeutic space. Being deeply met, seen, heard, received and accepted where we are at is on its own a repairing moment that helps to mend the old relational wounds.
I as an empath I went through my life experiences with deep sensitivity and awareness of the feelings of other people. Growing up in a toxic environment and later immigration (alone to a new culture at 20 y.o) allowed me to go through a big self-growth and personally understand the symptoms of complex post-traumatic stress. Luckily, I found my calling very early in life and psychotherapy became my huge passion. I learned to notice and understand my own feelings and started to pay attention to my own needs, which in the past I used to keep other people responsible for. It helped to gain self-compassion and improve my self-esteem, as well as finding and keeping the loving and healthy relationship.
After I graduated with Psych. degree and Counselling diploma I still continue developing competency in different psychotherapeutic modalities focused on different treatment goals.
In my approach I combine a talk therapy where we get to explore your story and your feelings with a body focused trauma processing therapy which allows you in a short term to gain release of the old chronic stress and patterns from your mind and body.
If you are feeling that I could be the right fit for you, I will be happy to meet you where you are at in your life and support you through your journey back to your authentic self.